3 Mindset Shifts Before You Hit a Brick Wall (Episode 124)
What limiting beliefs may be holding you back from the life you dreamed of? It sounds a bit hokey, but seriously. Think about it. A limiting belief is something that holds you back; a limit you cannot cross. It may be what you think you can earn, how creative you are, or even just about your own self worth.
In this episode and post below, we'll share three tips for mindset shifts to move past those limiting beliefs and flip that script!
Upper Limit Challenges
This has been a busy month for me with coaching, and I love working with individuals and couples on getting focused and intentional about creating the life they thrive in, not simply reacting to what is thrown their way. This week, I’ll share some mindset shifts to help you both at work and at home.
I've had three clients recently where we've dug deep into mindset and re-evaluating their limiting beliefs. The first step is simply acknowledging what that looks like!
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Three of my current coaching clients have been struggling with what we in the coaching world will often label as "Upper Limit" challenges. Here are the limiting beliefs we broke down:
One has had multiple six figure businesses – his ability to make money is unquestionable. His family dynamics are solid. Yet his past looms over him as his punishment that is keeping him from moving forward.
One is looking at life as an empty-nester, and what her next steps will be, and she’s said “I don’t know” so many times it’s become more of her identity than she realized.
And another had a dream so strong as a child that she tunnel-visioned down one path and felt trapped, incapable of moving out, and questioning how all her hard work would apply anywhere else when she was so specific in one career path…and, her high achievements left little room for fostering deep relationships, as she hoped to have her career on autopilot before she focused on romance.
So what do these all have in common? Mindset, of course. The first step in moving forward starts with your own mindset, always. Are you moving forward with confidence, or setting yourself up for failure before you even start by your own lack of faith?
Qualify, don't Quantify
It’s not just about putting a number or date around goals; it’s about paying attention to what emotions you feel behind it.
What does it feel like to accomplish your goals? How do you feel in the process, and how will you feel once you’ve achieved it?
This can help so much in really looking at what goals are worth pursuing…and your why behind it.
It's not just about the date or the number; what is the feeling - in the process, and once you accomplish it?
Some additional resources for you
- Feeling completely overwhelmed and stressed out?
- Founding Episode of MSN - Our Story
- Focus, Awe, and Not Waiting for "One Day"
- Ultimate Resources for Entrepreneurs
- Head Clutter and the Chaos of Overwhelm
- Opposites Attract…And How To Live With Them (Episode 86)
- My Marriage Sucks (Episode 66)
- What We Have Here Is A Failure To Communicate! (Episode 8)
- What Do You Want This Life To Be? (Episode 16)
- 37 Essential Tips To Save Your Marriage
- Love And Marriage – See The Good
Flip The Script
The first step I did with my clients was to help them “flip the script” – to look at their self-talk and how it was affecting them, and how powerful those things we tell ourselves are.
Pay attention to your self-talk. What you say about yourself to others, and those things you may not even speak aloud, yet berate yourself over in your head. What are your limiting beliefs that hold you back? You’re not good enough, smart enough, worthy enough… What would you be without that thought?
I’m a huge fan of Byron Katie’s work, and often send my clients to go through “The Work” on their own. I’ve personally experienced the powerful transformation of this practice.
Here is a quick breakdown of her process, and she has so much more detail on her site.
Let It FLow
One of my clients is big into transcendental meditation. Now, if you’ve ever done any meditation, especially any guided meditation, you may be familiar with something along the lines of this:
Thoughts may come into your mind, and that’s okay. Acknowledge them, and then let them flow. Don’t hold on to any thought, but let it float through your mind and let it go.
You can use this same concept beyond meditation and in your life. Negative thoughts and insecurities are definitely going to creep in to your life. We’re human, and those thoughts are just as much a part of us as feeling sadness, fear, anger, joy and surprise.
Accept and Let Go
This isn’t about denying your feelings; it’s about acknowledging them, sifting through them, and choose to let some go. What is truly helping you? What self talk motivates and encourages you, and what makes you feel stuck?
When you allow for your thoughts to flow through you instead of getting stuck on a negative thought, what happens is they become merely speed-bumps – a quick slow down on your path – and not a full roadblock or wall.
Let your thoughts be speed-bumps to acknowledge and let flow; not a wall that stops you in your tracks.
Your Weekly Challenge:
What is holding you back? What are you tolerating? Identify one thing you are ready to let go of, and do this process. Look at the feelings behind your desire. Flip the script. Do the Work. Acknowledge, and then let it go.
Revisit your why. It will evolve and change. Talk things out and discuss what's working and what isn't. Explore different stories and determine what you want your relationship - and your family to be like.
Ask yourself some key questions:
- Are we where we want to be?
- Are we truly happy?
- What am I tolerating?
- What role can I play to improve this?
You have an impact. Everywhere you go, you have an impact. Emotionally, energetically, you have more power than you may give yourself credit for.
I am passionate that each of us has our own unique strengths that are important to share. You are powerful beyond measure. You make an impact. And so does everyone else in your family. The more you can understand that, know how to interconnect, and have grace, the more your family will thrive. Because ultimately, the uniqueness in each of us strengthens all of us.
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