5 Mindset Shifts To Become Your Best Self
This is a guest post by Rebecca Brown. Rebecca is a translator by day, and a traveler mostly at night. She is an expert on living with jet lag – and packing in tiny suitcases. You can read more of her exploits at RoughDraft and on Twitter.
Best Self first, Parenting, Second
Becoming a parent challenges everything you ever thought you knew in your life and about life. You start to consider things you didn’t know were possible or weren’t a part of your day-to-day routine and you want to become better. You feel like it’s finally time to grow up and become a role model. It should be easy, you should be able to just brush off that younger version of yourself and step into your new, big parent trousers, but sometimes it doesn’t just happen.
If you ask any parent, they all want to be their best selves. They all want to be the best role model for their kids but not all of them know how to shift certain aspects of their lives, their mentalities, that will get them where they want to be. And it’s ok to not know how to do it alone because parenting is about coming together and figuring things out along the way.
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It Takes a Village...
It takes a village…
How you can shift your mindset to become your best self 101:
#1: Take A Step Back
Sometimes, the best solution is to take a step back. Look at the bigger picture. Really think about your actions, where you’re at and where you’d like to be.
To become a good parent, I believe one needs to remember where we come from, remember our young days and realize that we have grown up a lot. I also like to reflect on what things I needed as a kid, what I wished I had from my parents…
This also helps me put into perspective the things I’m doing nowadays and how I can improve.
#2: Accept It Won't Always Be Perfect
It is something some of us struggle with - this idea of being the best parent and, am I doing it right? Especially nowadays with social media judging every single move, parents are questioning themselves a lot.
Should I give this to my baby, can I let him play outside, should I be ok with that…?
Just so much pressure from everyone and everywhere! So, take this as your gentle reminder that it won’t always be perfect. You will doubt yourself and your choices and you’ll want to compare, but that’s the thing, you’re already trying!
To me, the fact that you are willing to do some trial and error but still keep trying says a whole lot about you and your mindset than what bottle you should be buying. It won’t be perfect, but you’ll keep trying your best.
#3: Ask For Help
Yes, we can ask for help and we should! No one is born knowing how to parent; you learn it!
And yes, it does take a village, so use it to your full advantage. Ask questions to other parents, friends, even your parents! Ask questions at the store, to the doctor, the nurses, the kindergarten teacher, just ask questions.
When you accept that it’s ok to not know it all, you’ll learn a lot more.
#4: "You" Time
To become a better version of ourselves, we need time to make a change. Having “me” time is not being selfish and should, in fact, be part of your routine.
Make sure you allocate some time every day, week, every month (whatever you feel is right and works with your schedule) to take some time to just relax. It could be a five minute meditation or short walk. And maybe, you can actually get a full day just for yourself. Get your nails done, your hair cut, book in a massage, anything that will take you away from parenting time to “you”, individual time.
You want to be better for your kids, so start treating yourself better.
#5: Read A Book
Not any book, but a book that will guide you through this time in your life. If you really hate reading longer texts than this article, well, listen to a podcast or an audio book.
What’s important is that you’re listening to other people’s opinions and perspectives. For one to grow and expand, one needs to immerse into different lives.
By hearing what others have to say about parenthood, about changing yourself and your mind, you might realize things about yourself you didn’t know before. You might end up discovering you had it in you all along and you just needed a little push to see it.
Gain Some Perspective
And let’s not forget one very important thing - just listen to your children. Ask them the questions and really pay attention to what they have to say.
Sometimes we’re too self-critical and, in our children’s eyes, we’re the best! Listen to how they feel, what they need from you, and I can promise you you’ll be there to give it all to them.
You’ll become your best self by paying attention to the ones who truly know what they need.
“I came to parenting the way most of us do — knowing nothing and trying to learn everything.” — Mayim Bialik
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